Her Secret Santa: A Christmas Protector Romance (Perfect Kisses Book 3) Page 7

  I sighed. “That sounds so hot, but I’m afraid that it might be way wrong and come back to bite us in the ass.”

  “We can throw some ass biting in there,” he teased.

  “When were you thinking of doing this insanity?” I asked.

  “Oh, we could do it later tonight if you want to. I have a spare room that we can make up to be totally dark behind us as a backdrop. We will have a dark room, dark mattress cover, and only an overhead light for the camera. It is bare, dark, and it is perfect if I do say so myself. But if it is still too risky for you then we can scrub the idea.”

  I shook my head and smiled at him. “Not a chance. I’m ready.”

  And I was. My body was hot as fire just thinking about it.

  I loved the camera.

  The way it watched us was intoxicating. I found that I was performing as much as I was lost inside of my own world. The idea that a lot of people were probably watching us right then and there was so hot. I loved it. I was getting off so good from it. The moment that I knew the camera was rolling and we were live to who could guess how many people, I was lost in the whole thing.

  When we arrived back at Tony’s, I was amazed to see that this room was already set up. It was like he’d been planning for it, or he had texted his butler to set up everything just the way he wanted it to be by the time we got there. And there it was.

  I stepped into the room and Tony handed me a dark mask. It was dark and expressionless except the mouth was open, carefully cut in a way so that oral activities would not be in any way restricted. The eyes were dark with just enough of a slit made for sight. It slipped over my head and I carefully tucked my hair up inside of it.

  Tony wrapped his arms around me and kissed me after he put his own mask on. “Are you ready?” he asked.

  “I am.”

  Tony turned on all three cameras that had been set up around the room in a circle facing us. This would be streamed to the internet. I kept returning to that fact. And that terrified me. But I knew I wanted it. This was the most exciting and thrill-seeking thing I’d ever done. Everyone would know me intimately without realizing that they did. My family, my friends, the people at work, people on the street…so many people would watch this. Oh, I was so wet at the very thought.

  Tony stripped the dress from my body little by little. I felt myself opening up, becoming exposed, and I had to fight the desire to cover myself up. But it was slowly dissipating. I was becoming more warmed up to the idea bit by bit. When Tony removed my bra and my panties, the whole thing clicked for me. I stood there opened for all to see. I was actually catering to the camera now. It was fun beyond words.

  I went to work on Tony and helped him remove his suit. Then his shirt, his t-shirt, and every other article of clothing. As I knelt down to help him with his boxer shorts, his huge boner popped free from the fabric right into my face, almost landing in my mouth. Tony smiled at the idea and I did as well. I pulled the boxers to the floor and he kicked the silk garment to the side.

  Then without even thinking, I took him in my mouth. He tasted sweet, a little salty, and smooth. His skin was so smooth down there. His rock-hard boner pressed into my mouth as he pushed harder into me until I was taking him all the way down. Opening my throat, I allowed him to rest there against the depths of my mouth. The head of his cock pushed back against my throat and I swallowed using all of my muscles as I bobbed my head on him.

  He moaned lightly and rested his hand on the back of my head as I pleasured him with my mouth. I used my right hand on his balls. I would squeeze him tightly and then let him go. And then I would pulsate the squeezes against his tight nuts. Then I would glide my tongue up and down his shaft to send patterns of delight echoing through him.

  I pulled him out of my mouth and licked his head, tonguing that bulbous tip of his shaft around and around before I dipped him fully back in my mouth. With my other hand I was fingering myself deeply, getting those sweet juices going. I was so ready. I had to have him inside of me.

  I pulled his cock out of my mouth and I turned around on my hands and knees. I reached back and spread my cheeks to show him and the cameras my goods. He watched me for a moment and took a good look at my body. It turned me on when he put his eyes on my body. To know he was checking me out when I was so open and raw and everyone else was also—that was the best.

  Tony dropped to his knees and got in position behind me. A moment later I felt his cock entering me from behind. My wet lips stretched as his cock pushed into me quickly and stretched me to my limit. I cried out in passion and shock. He paid it no mind and began to fuck me like a battering ram, his cock pounding right into my pussy. I was taking him all the way in. He was fucking me so hard that he had to grab my hips to hold me in place against his pelvis while he fucked the shit out of me. I was so wet for him. Yes… I wanted him to fuck me until I could not stand properly. I wanted to feel his epic load blast into me until it gushed back out from overflowing.

  My big tits hung low, almost scraping the floor as he fucked me. As if reading my mind Tony reached under with one hand and cradled my left breast in his big hand. He squeezed it hard in repetitive, slow movements. I pushed my chest harder into him to facilitate his hand and he squeezed even harder. This little bit of pain helped me grow closer to my climax.

  It was building inside of me. I was almost there… shit… oh, I could hardly breathe. My toes curled, my eyes closed tightly involuntarily, and then I felt my orgasm rip through my body like some hurricane force of total mind-bending lust. I tried to breathe but my body was too tensed up. I thought I might actually pass out from the strain, but the pleasure was all worth it.

  A moment later I felt Tony releasing his orgasm inside of me. His load was thick and huge. He kept pumping it in me with every single thrust of his powerful cock. I felt finally full and contented. I was one with him.

  When it was over, Tony turned off the cameras and then removed his mask. I removed mine, and he helped me to my feet where he took me in his arms and held me closely.

  He kissed me, his lips brushing sweetly against my lips. Then he looked into my eyes and said, “I love you, Julie Ashby. I love you so much.”

  Hearing him say those words made me want to cry. It was so beautiful. But I was caught off guard completely. I cared about Tony. I wanted to be with him. I knew I was falling for him, which was scary enough, but having him actually confess his love to me right then and there was almost too much.

  This was all happening too fast. Love… I’d been there before. And it had not ended well. No, it hadn’t ended well at all. I still had the scars to prove it. I reached back and touched the small scar at the top of my ass. I could feel it. That shape. I had forgotten that I even had it until now. Well, chosen to not remember might have been a better way to describe it.

  “Are you ok?” Tony asked me.

  I realized it had been several seconds and I hadn’t responded. “Um, yeah. I’m fine.”

  I stepped away from him and pretended to look at the camera to make sure it was off. The light was off. I knew the camera was no longer filming. I was overreacting but I was suddenly very nervous.

  “You don’t seem fine. What’s wrong? You don’t love me back?” Tony asked.

  There was no emotion in his voice. I knew he would not crumble or get emotional if I told him I didn’t love him. I could be honest. “It’s not that I don’t care about you, Tony. There have been times when I felt that I am falling in love with you, but this is just so fast. And hearing you say those words out loud… it made it all seem so damn real. And I’m not sure I am ready to go there.”

  “Fine,” Tony said. “I’m not asking you to say it back. I’d only want to hear it from you if you meant it.”

  “Thanks,” I said. “I’m sorry. I should have handled that better.”

  Tony held my face in his hands and kissed me softly. “It’s fine.”

  I heard the words, but I knew that what I’d done did hurt him.

  And
I hated myself for it.

  9

  Tony

  I never should have said that to her.

  The door to my office closed behind me with a loud thud and I locked the door. It had been a long day. I had meeting after meeting and though they’d all been scheduled, it seemed that between meetings the phone was ringing off the hook, the emails were growing by leaps and bounds, and people were coming to my office because of some new catastrophe going on. Fuck. When it rained it poured? I definitely understood that expression.

  I hadn’t talked much to Julie the past three days. It wasn’t that we were trying to avoid each other, but I was giving her a bit of space. I saw her in passing in the hallway a few times, and we were cordial, but we were still keeping up the ruse that we were not dating. That wasn’t something I felt comfortable coming out with right now, especially when I now realized Julie wanted to take things much slower than I did.

  What had made me say those words to her that night? Why? Why did I do it?

  Because I meant those words. That was why I’d said them. I meant that I loved Julie. I did. And after we had that incredible sex and wonderful evening, I was pretty sure that she felt the same way I did. You couldn’t have sex like that without a strong emotional connection. It was necessary to feel that good physically with each other. At least it was for me. Maybe I’ve always been a bit wired wrong. I didn’t know.

  I grabbed the glass from the cabinet and then a bottle of whiskey. Maybe I’d spend the afternoon alone getting sloshed. That was always fun. No. I had too much work to do. Besides, I hoped Julie and I could get together tonight. The past few nights she’d been busy. She was doing something with her friends last night and she was doing something with her parents the night before that. Or so she said. It was very odd that since I made that mistake that she was suddenly unavailable. Was my error that drastic? Did it make her rethink what we had and whether she even wanted to be with me?

  Shit. Why did I have to tell her that? It was a mistake, but I knew I wasn’t sorry for the way I felt or the fact that I’d expressed those feelings. I cared deeply about this woman. I loved her with all my heart and soul. I knew that as much as I knew anything. I knew it because I had not loved anyone in so long. I thought I never would find love again and that I was no longer even capable of it. A few months ago, I truly thought that I would spend my life alone with my money and fame. That was all I really had.

  And that was a hollow existence.

  But then this amazing woman walked into my life just out of the blue. And we hit it off. And things grew more intense. And we fell in love so fast. But now I was finding out this love was only one sided.

  But she said she did care about me. Maybe she just wasn’t ready to say it, yet? I just needed to give her more time. But I was doing just that. I was trying to give her as much time as I could. At least I thought so, but I knew almost nothing about relationships. Maybe I was just doing everything wrong.

  I poured the whiskey and took a deep drink. The sweet burn in my throat spread throughout my body and I felt the alcohol relaxing me. I grabbed my phone and texted Julie. “I’d like to see you tonight. Dinner at my place?”

  I pressed send and then waited. Julie had not responded to my text all day long. I’d texted her that morning to see how things went with her friends. She did not respond back to me. I threw myself into the rest of my day and now that I finally had a chance to get back with her, I was getting a bit worried that she hadn’t responded.

  I finished my drink and decided that I would swing by her department just to check on things. That way I could casually see her and make sure she seemed alright. Was she working too hard lately? Was that the sudden change? Or did she realize she was neglecting some other people in her life to hang out with me?

  I was losing my mind by overthinking all of this. If Julie cared about me as she said she did then everything would be fine. I wasn’t sure why I was getting a little bit nervous about things. I hardly ever got nervous about anything. I often took insane business risks, and I took risks in my personal life as well. That was the rush I was always looking for.

  But this was different. I was actually worried. I hated being worried. It was such an uncomfortable feeling and usually it was unwarranted. I was sure this would turn out to be silly as well.

  I made my way down to marketing and the first person I ran into was Barb. I didn’t see Julie at her desk. As a matter of fact, her desk looked pretty bare and empty. There was nothing on it.

  “Hey, funny seeing you down here,” Barb said. “What’s going on?”

  “I just thought I’d see how things were coming. Is the team going to be ready for that presentation Friday?”

  “Absolutely. We are all over that.”

  “Hey, where is Julie?”

  “Oh, I don’t know. She didn’t come in today. And I guess she took her stuff home over the weekend. Kind of weird.”

  Yes, it was. Now I was getting very worried.

  “Is there something I can answer for you?” Barb asked.

  I let the question hang because I was already too far from her to turn around and give her an answer. I was gone. I was almost running towards the elevator to get out of the building and see if Julie was actually at home. Was she sick? Or did she just decide to blow off work today? That wasn’t like her. She loved what she did as much as I did. This was not an employee blowing off work when there was as big deadline looming. Julie was not that person.

  I made it out of the building and got into my Jaguar that I kept at the office just in case I felt like driving myself around. I spun out of the parking garage quickly and slipped onto the main road. I felt like gunning the thing and running every red light until I got to Julie’s building and made sure that she was alright. I had to hold myself back. I was getting freaked out over nothing. She was probably hung over. Maybe she and her friends painted the town red last night and she just slept through her alarm. It wasn’t like her, but she was human, and she was able to be forgiven the occasional lapse in judgment. Hell, I had a bad lapse in judgment almost all the time.

  Like when I’d told the love of my life that I loved her.

  I gripped the wheel tightly and groaned at my egregious error. What had I been thinking?

  I pulled up to Julie’s apartment building. I pressed her button for her to buzz me in. It took a moment, but eventually I got an answer. But I did not recognize the voice. It sounded like an older woman. “Hello?”

  “Um, yes…I may have pressed the wrong button,” I said. “I’m looking for Julie Ashby’s apartment.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry she doesn’t live here anymore,” the woman replied.

  My heart sank. What in the hell was going on?

  “What? She lived there just yesterday. I don’t understand.”

  “I’m Mrs. Baggins, the landlady. I just happened to be in this apartment getting things in order for the new tenants to move in. I agree that Julie’s departure was quite fast. She just called me and told me she was leaving town. I’ll have to bill her for the remainder of her lease, but I couldn’t talk her out of it. She sounded in a big hurry. I don’t have any more news than that.”

  “What? This doesn’t make any sense,” I said. “Are you sure about this?”

  “Yes, I’m afraid so. I’m just happy I was able to find a new tenant so fast. Say, are you with that other guy who was looking for her early this morning?”

  I didn’t speak. Another guy?

  “What? No… someone else was here looking for her?”

  “Yeah, some man. I didn’t get the name, but he said it was very urgent that he speak with her. I do hope Julie isn’t in some kind of trouble. I don’t suppose you’d be able to tell me if she was.”

  “Trouble? Not that I know of. Thanks,” I said.

  I hurried to the car and slipped behind the wheel. I flipped the ignition and the engine roared to life. I started to put the car in gear but then I realized I had no idea where I was going. Where was Jul
ie? Where had she gone? None of this made any sense.

  And who was that man looking for her? What had Julie gotten herself into? And why didn’t she come to me for help?

  I thought a moment. I felt like my entire world was crumbling apart. This was madness. I missed Julie already and I wanted to hold her, to just make sure that she was ok. I had to find her.

  Who would know where she’d gone? Who would have any idea where she might have taken off to? Her family. Her parents. I would go speak to them.

  I pulled out my phone and did some digging. After a few searches I had their home address. I drove there as fast as I could.

  Julie’s parents, Kevin and Tanya lived in a nice two-story home on the outskirts of the city in a very nice suburb. They were a bit surprised to see me, but they both recognized me the moment they saw me. They were nice enough to invite me in. I explained the situation to them and then the hesitation started. They both seemed as if they were trying to keep a big secret. They knew where their daughter was. I could feel it. And they were scared.

  “We can’t say,” Tanya said. “It’s too dangerous.”

  “What is? Please talk to me. I can help.”

  “We know you mean well, and you seem like a nice man, but trust us when we tell you our daughter is safe now and we want to keep it that way.”

  I sighed. “Listen. I care deeply for your daughter. She is very important to me. We’ve become much more than just friends. I doubt she told you, but we’ve been dating for a while. Things have become pretty serious and I love your daughter.”

  Their eyes lit up as they looked at each other. She hadn’t told them anything.

  Kevin cleared his throat and spoke up. “I’m not sure we can tell you anything. We promised her we wouldn’t say a word to anyone.”